Archive for March 6th, 2005

Mar 06 2005

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Complaint du jour: Don’t talk to me while I’m watching TV. I have the attention span of a particularly capricious two year old, and can’t pay attention to two things at once. If I’m watching Gilmore Girls, you are not going to win this contest. Wait until the commercials. That’s what they’re there for. In fact, I will love you more for distracting me from their dullness and/or vulgarity.

Now back to your (ir)regularly scheduled programming.

Yesterday, I went to the first home game of the Blue Jays’ Spring Training. The ballpark is charmingly high-school scale, unlike Pac Bell Park, and the crowd was enthusiastic. I’m sorry to report that the home team lost 8-4 to the very nearly home team Tampa Bay, whose team has two ex-Blue Jays, Kevin Cash and Josh Phelps.

Seen at the ballpark: VP. We’ve all heard of VPL*, but this was the full-on VP. The woman in question was wearing sheer white trousers which revealed the entire vast expanse of her flowered grannypants.~shudder~

Heard at the ballpark: “Git yer ass outta my beer!” I hasten to add that mine was not the ass in question.

Seen outside the ballpark: A 1958 Edsel station wagon! Pretty much this color, too. And pretty. Much-needed aesthetic relief after the VP (and who knew that a VP could be more repulsive than Cheney?).

*If you are fortunate enough not to have heard of this particular fashion felony, it stands for Visible Panty Lines.

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