Florida

Speed & Demons

I went outside this morning to leave offerings for Grey Cat, and was astonished to see a hearse speeding down my street, its tires squealing as it went around the corner. A speeding hearse is a strange sight indeed. About a week ago, I started leaving food and water...

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Florida by the Numbers

Farewell, Florida! Number of palmetto bugs seen: 6 Number of palmetto bugs squashed: 6 Gross-out factor: On a scale of one to ten (10 being CSI close-ups), about 100. Number of geckos seen: About a dozen. Number of geckos scared: See above. Number of armadillos seen: 2 (they are...

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Accidental

Calamity Suzy Rides Again… …or not, as the case may be. I’ve taken the accident-prone talent to a whole new level. Now I don’t even have to be awake. Yesterday, I actually woke up with a scratch on my face from an errant feather in my pillow. I’m beginning...

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Southern Shoppin’

I love the names of the grocery stores in Florida. My total favorite is Piggly Wiggly, followed by Winn-Dixie (fun fact: the word “dixie” comes from an American mispronunciation of the French word for ten (dix) printed on ten dollar bills in New Orleans in the 19th century) and...

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Calamity Suzy

It’s Calamity Suzy!! Yesterday I: – Fell and scraped both knees, which are now even less fit for public viewing than usual, being red and puffy. I hasten to add that this was sun-related and not alcohol related: I was blinded by the sun and tripped on a huge...

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Road Trip to Florida

You may be wondering why it took me so long to get to Florida. Traumatized by recent airport experiences, it seemed like a good idea at the time to drive down, since I was on the east coast anyway. Big, as the Governator would say, mistake. I hadn’t taken...

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