May 20 2023
Gone
Melanie
A friend I have had since we were both in our teens was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer about a month ago. The cancer spread to her bones and lymph system, and she deteriorated rapidly, much more rapidly than the doctors expected. The first week after her diagnosis, she was thinking of a trip to Greece. The second week, it was a road trip with her beloved son, and the third week, she could hardly walk up the stairs.
Melanie is a planner, so immediately after receiving her diagnosis and the doctors’ opinions that she had about three months to live, she swung into action, contacting her wide network of friends and family, settling her financial and business affairs, meeting with hospice workers and doctors about how to exit this life with dignity, and deciding where her ashes should rest.
On the day she chose, she gathered together her ex husband (the father of her twins), her ex boyfriend, her twins, and her much-loved dog, Piper. She had a glass of wine and a last cigarette, made final phone calls to friends who could not be there, and then the doctors asked if she was ready. She said, “I’ve had a good life. I’m ready,” and as they played Stairway to Heaven (she loved Led Zeppelin), Melanie left us and went on to her next adventure. It was swift and peaceful.
Melanie handled this situation with so much grace and dignity. It is both inspiring and humbling. She lived her life with integrity, courage, curiosity, and an unstoppable sense of adventure. Everything she did, she did with her whole heart. I will carry my friend and her memory in my heart.
A YEAR AGO: Some miscellaneous news.
FIVE YEARS AGO: Sudden and tragic deaths. Is May the new Official Month of Death?
TEN YEARS AGO: A delightful dinner with friends.
TWENTY YEARS AGO: Packing procrastination.
Comments Off on Gone