Suzy Says

It seems to be acceptable to say you are a collector of children’s literature. The phrase sounds quaintly eccentric and rather esoteric, and I love that. Over the years, I have amassed quite the collection, which I’m planning on leaving to the Nation, since reading children’s books is as close as I want to get to actual children. The truth is, I have never outgrown my love of children’s books. It may be because I never really grew up, or because I have such a short attention span, or because with age comes a certain amount of nostalgia. Or maybe it’s because they’re fun to read.

My latest addiction is courtesy of John, who picked up the first three volumes of Lemony Snicket’s oeuvre at a great little store on Polk Street and surprised me with them.

Number one, they are unbelievably charming to look at. Aesthetics are important to me. Call me shallow, but whatever it is, I like it pretty. The books are a pleasure to look at, each volume a small, beautifully illustrated hardcover book with delicious endpapers (when’s the last time you even saw endpapers?). And who could resist a series of books called “A Series of Unfortunate Events”, starting with (what else?) The Bad Beginning? Now, there’s a title I can relate to.

Number two, no-one knows anything about Lemony Snicket. Also, Lemony Snicket is such a great name, and incredibly fun to say. Try it.

Number three, they are wonderfully written and incredibly entertaining. They have caused me to stay in the bath for over an hour reading them, putting in more and more hot water until I am in danger of becoming prune-like and only the previously mentioned aesthetic sense makes me leap out just in time to resume the dreary tasks of the day.

Parents should love their kids reading these books, because it will improve their vocabulary no end. Sprinkled throughout each book are explanations of long words, such as “…had been a catastrophe, a word which here means “an utter disaster involving tragedy, deception, and Count Olaf.” [Count Olaf is the bad guy in all the books.]

And finally…I love it that each and every volume warns you of the horrors within. The books concern three children who are orphaned in the first book, and spend the rest of the series trying to escape the evil Count Olaf, who wants their enormous fortune. And what I like best about the Baudelaire orphans is that their lives are worse than mine. It’s the same thing that makes people watch Jerry Springer and soap operas: at least my life isn’t as screwed up as theirs. Even if they’re fictional. Maybe they’d have to be.