Suzy Says

Well, dear readers, today marks the tenth anniversary of my blog. Can you believe it?

Ten years ago, my life was different. I was married. I lived in San Francisco. Both of my parents were alive. I went to Europe at least once a year. I worked at a big corporation in a big building. John and I owned a lovely condo in one of the nicest neighborhoods in San Francisco. I love that city still, and my heart I think it will always be “home”. That is how I thought of it when I first saw it, way back in the 1980s.

Now…John and I live a couple of hundred miles apart, though we still haven’t gotten around to getting divorced. He kept the cats when we split up, though only one of them is left, other than, incredibly, my late mother’s cat. We have gone through the losses together, the most recent one in January, and I’m glad we can always be there for each other when it matters. Sometimes I think that being married for 15 years counts as a success, even if in the end you break up. Especially if you stay friends.

Now…I live in the depth (or heart!) of the country, where my doors don’t have locks and my cats roam freely, except at night. My passport lies neglected in a drawer, though it hasn’t expired yet, so there’s still hope. I work for a very small company – well, two very small companies, if you count the jobette – and I make a lot less money than I did at the big corporation. But I’m not mired in bureaucracy and bullshit and office politics. Some things money can’t buy.

Now…my parents are both gone, and in checking my archives, I see that my mother’s unspeakable second husband left her penniless a day after I started blogging. It was all downhill from there, with her cancer diagnosis and her long, valiant fight, which ended at the hospital where my sister still works. I think we three “kids” did our best for her, and I’m glad that I came to help as often as I did. I feel a hard-won peace about my relationship with my mother. My father, as you know, is a different story, and I will love him and miss him until it’s my turn to find out who’s right and who’s wrong about the afterlife.

Now…I rent an eccentric house which is slowly endearing itself to me. Sure, it’s completely uninsulated, cold and drafty in the winter, hot in the summer, and hard to keep clean. But it’s unusual and peaceful and I appreciate that. I’m glad to be closer to my family in every way, and on the whole, I think I’m lucky.

Thanks to all of you who have come along for the ride. Over the years, I have made some great friends and been so thankful for your love and support. I appreciate your friendship and readership. Here’s to the next ten years!