Suzy Says

For example…

When my friend A used to model internationally (that was before she got her PhD in pure math and a job at an investment bank in London, of course), she told me that food stylist was one of the hardest jobs in fashion. I can now see the wisdom of this since I’ve started taking pictures of Thursday dinners. Fun fact: in magazines, ice cream is usually dyed instant mashed potatoes, since they don’t melt under the lights. And turkeys have wood varnish applied to them to give them that fresh-roasted look.

This week’s dinner is from the great Jacques Pépin’s “Fast Food My Way”. “Fast” seems to be a relative term, since it took me the entire length of Iggy Pop’s “New Values” and part of Lou Reed’s “Rock & Roll Animal” to get it ready. I also made some modifications as I went along. Apparently I think I know better than a world-famous chef who has served no fewer than three French heads of state.

Pasta, Ham, and Vegetable Gratin
With apologies to Jacques Pépin

About 1 & 3/4 cups pasta shells or penne
1 & 1/2 cups diced (1/2 inch) cooked ham
3/4 cup corn kernels [I used canned]
1/2 cup peas, fresh or frozen
1 & 1/2 cups diced (1/2 inch) zucchini
3/4 cup grated Swiss cheese
2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons flour
2 cups milk
1/2 cup heavy cream
2 tablespoons grated Parmesan
Salt & pepper to taste

Cook pasta according to package directions. Drain, cool under running water, then drain again.

While the pasta was cooking, I prepped the ham and vegetables and made the sauce. I tend to clean up as I go along, but this has more to do with the fact that my only kitchen counter is three feet wide and a foot and a half deep than it does with innate tidiness.

Now, Jacques wants you to mix the veggies, pasta, ham, and cheese in a separate bowl. You can tell that he has minions to do dishes for him, whereas the only dishwasher I have ever had is Self. So I mixed the pasta, veggies, and ham in the baking dish.

I put the cheese into the sauce instead of mixing it in with the pasta, veggies, and ham. I figured this way, you get better cheese distribution. Also, I used closer to a cup of cheese. Maybe even more. I’m a well-known fromage-phile.

Melt the butter in a saucepan. Jacques uses unsalted butter, which I personally do not believe in, since it pretty much tastes like Crisco, but it’s up to you. Add the flour, and mix it in with a whisk. Add milk, and bring to a boil, stirring with the whisk until the sauce thickens. Add salt and pepper. Remove from heat.

At this point, I mixed in the cheese. You’re supposed to add the cream here, but Megan was out of half & half, so I skipped it and didn’t miss it. I didn’t even add extra milk to make up for it, and it was fine.

Heat the broiler. Combine the sauce with the pasta mixture and transfer to a shallow glass baking dish. Sprinkle the Parmesan on top. Broil about four inches from heat source for 6-8 minutes, until bubbly and hot and the surface is lightly browned. Serve immediately.