Suzy Says

Not only am I a semi-invalid with housemaid’s knee* (or housework’s revenge), I’m semi-invalid as a person, too.

I didn’t get that job. They called me early on Friday morning, when my sibs and brother-in-law had gone to return the truck. it took a convoy again because my heroic brother was going to work, so he drove the truck, Megan drove his car (so he could get home from work later) and Rob drove Megan’s car (so they could get home).

So I was alone when the call came. I was so taken aback that I didn’t ask why, which is what everyone else asked me first when I told them about it. I asked them to keep me in mind if anything else came up, and that was it. I just sat there stunned.

It doesn’t really matter why they didn’t hire me. The fact is they didn’t. I could (and have) imagined countless reasons: thought I was over qualified; didn’t like me; concerned about my current job; hired their cousin, etc. Even if they had told me why, it might not have been the real reason anyway.

It does annoy me that I risked life and limb to interview with them and then they rejected me. I thought I had done well, and clearly I hadn’t. It all comes of interviewing once every twenty years. I can’t say that this experience has really improved my self-confidence, and it definitely won’t help if/when I get another interview.

It’s also humiliating because I told all of you about it, and they called all of my references and spoke with them exhaustively and exhaustingly. Two of the references are current colleagues, which makes it even worse.

I have to wonder how how open and honest I should be when I blog, especially when you hear about people being fired for what they say on their blogs, or prospective employers demanding access to Facebook profiles, etc. I think one’s blog should be a personal place to write thoughts and feelings, and blogs and Facebook are none of your employer’s, or prospective employer’s, business.

But it’s hard for me to know that you all know I’m a failure. I guess that’s the flip side of the love and support you always give me. Although I’m a Gemini, sometimes I wish things were one sided: the good side.

*I wonder how real housemaids managed when afflicted with the Knee. I can’t imagine Victorian employers allowing their maids to stay in bed for days. Maybe they just fired them and got new ones back then.