Oct 16 2009
News for Papers
If you look carefully through the plum tree, you can see the remains of Oxycotin Girl’s former abode. The destruction started a few days ago, when I thought they were merely replacing the roof. But after peeling off the roof, they started to tear down the supports, and are now slowly tearing down the walls. Surely there must be a faster way of razing a house? I can’t tell you how hard it is on a girl’s few remaining nerves to hear nails being wrenched out of boards (squeeakkk!) for hours on end, then hammering and sawing on walls. It’s a discordant symphony.
With the Destructo Symphony in the background, I packed up a few more boxes. I never thought I’d say this, but I’m running out of newspapers. I’ve been saving them up for this very purpose, but like all people who move, I discovered that I underestimated the amount of things I have – despite the fact that I packed and unpacked them less than two years ago.
Slow learner, I guess.
One thing I did learn was the reason for the demise of the American newspaper. It’s simple: the newsprint comes off on your hands. By the time I had packed up my champagne glasses, decanters, and the heirloom Wedgwood salad bowl and biscuit jar, my hands were black. Even my Sweet Heart nails were smudged. I had made the mistake of scratching my nose and pushing my hair back, so I looked like a pre-Prince Cinderella. How do these folks expect people to read the paper on the way to work and arrive in a presentable state?