Jul 03 2003
Sporty Suzy
OK, all you fashion mavens out there, I need your advice. What does a girl wear to a baseball game? Having never attended one in my life – or any other kind of sporting event – I have no idea.
My first thought was to bring a hat, even though I seem to have a cartoonishly large head, since they rarely, if ever, fit me. Rather, they perch on top of my head quite uselessly, where they can be borne away by the lightest breeze or slightest breath of scandal, which you will agree is a problem. I have been assured that our seats are in the shade, but have a perfectly reasonable fear of sitting in the sun for four hours or more. Yes, it’s San Francisco, but the game starts around 12:30 p.m., when the fog is gone, and it won’t be back by the end of the game.
So I’m pretty much out of ideas, other than sunglasses.
Now, you’re probably asking yourself when I metamorphosized into Sports Suzy, or if I am in fact the real Suzy and not some Pod Suzy or John playing a practical joke. I assure that I am the one and only Suzy, and the only reason I am breaking my life-long record of not going to any form of sporting event is simple: it’s a work thing, and I have to go. If I don’t look out, I’ll end up setting foot in Florida next, or going to Disney World/Land/Universe and all my records will start dropping like dominoes. This better not be the thin edge of the wedge.