Sep 29 2006

The Clown Car

Published by at 10:05 am under Uncategorized

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The Clown Car, at the World Famous Hamburger Ranch and Pasta Farm

For some reason, the past two cars I have rented have been very odd, bright blue Chevrolets*. First, there was the embarrassing weird Malibu hatchback thing I had to drive all over Motown last month. This time, it was the Clown Car. It looked like something the Blue Meanies would drive.

It was all they had at the rental place when I showed up (and for the record, it was early, and not late, for a change). I got in and discovered that the seat was really high (I felt like a trucker up there) and the windshield low and slanted. Couldn’t figure out how to move seat. Looked for owner’s manual, which was conspicuous by its absence. Finally figured out that the buttons on the side of the seat would make it ooze slowly down and forward, if you were patient enough. Once the seat was low enough, though, it was hard to see the dials showing minor details like speed and how much gas there was.

To put on the seatbelt, you had to be a contortionist or lift up the armrest, fasten belt, and put armrest down again. On driving it out of the garage, learned that it had a huge blind spot, just what you want for highway driving. I was beginning to suspect that it had been designed by someone who had never actually driven it. Later discoveries included the odd fact that all the back windows were tinted, as if I were chauffering the famous, and that while you could lock and unlock the back doors from the back seats, you couldn’t put the windows down or up. It doesn’t seem like the best safety feature to allow your kids to open the doors and jump out while preventing them from sticking their hands out the window. Oh, and there were no speakers in the back.

This is why they invented the test drive.

*I am always reminded of Ramona the Pest, the heroine of a series of children’s books, who named her doll Chevrolet after her aunt’s car, because she thought it was the most beautiful name she had ever heard. The first Ramona book was published in 1955, and remarkably, Beverly Cleary, its author, is still alive. If only she’d write another Ramona story!

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5 responses so far

5 Responses to “The Clown Car”

  1. Mikeon 29 Sep 2006 at 9:24 am

    The van we rented this summer had no manual. What’s the deal with that? Is it because people would steal them?

  2. Jenniferon 29 Sep 2006 at 10:07 am

    We listened to Beverly Cleary’s ‘The Mouse and the Motorcycle’ on the way to PEI. Big hit with the kids (and Mike)!

  3. Alisonon 29 Sep 2006 at 10:57 am

    Sounds much like the Peugeot 1007 I rented on my last trip to France.

    Beverly Cleary is great! I think the last Ramona book was published in 1990 — long after I had read them. I ordered a box set for my daughter one Christmas.

  4. Karanon 30 Sep 2006 at 4:44 pm

    At some of the car rental places, you have to ask for the manual at the desk and some will charge you for it.

  5. Kathleenon 05 Oct 2006 at 5:46 am

    I know someone who bought that vehicle ON PURPOSE! Egads. It’s as if Chevy thought, “Hmm, the PT Cruiser’s sales are slowing down, maybe they just need an uglier, bigger version of it.” GM styling makes me gag. 😉