I’m finally released from Car Country. I set out to run some errands – when I say “run”, in my case, it’s really more like ambling, or moseying, or on a good day, strutting – and after about five blocks, I realized I was looking for a taxi. Which is…a car. And…driving. After all that complaining about the cars and the driving. Not to mention the fact that the Frightening Florida Fluff is approaching crisis levels. If I want to be Svelte Suzy again any time soon, I better start strolling those errands. And lots of ’em.
Confidential to Ben: Your idea of restoring my hair color to its original mouse has been vetoed by the Committee. First, it was determined that it would be far too expensive and require too much research to discern exactly what that color is. Even assuming that the natural coloring of the Great Speckled Suzy could be ascertained, it may well be impossible to reproduce it. Finally, the cost of therapy when I see a) What the color is; and 2) How much grey hair there is will be prohibitive and prolonged. So unless you inherit millions, become a rock star, or win the lottery, you will have to put up with your old auntie in her artificial state. That goes for the rest of you, too.
I’m also determined never to have blue poodle hair, either, no matter how old I get.
Brunch be Damned (aka Brunch of the Damned): A couple of friends came over for brunch today. I was planning to make Eggs Florentine, because I’m a big, fat showoff. Everything was going perfectly until, for the first time in my life, my Hollandaise sauce separated before my eyes. One moment, glossy, yellow perfection; the next, a curdled, separated mass of grossness. One moment, a fabulous cook; the next, a humliated culinary failure who can’t have a temper tantrum on account of company. They claimed not to mind, but I’m sensing anecdotes here, and possibly snickering.
Cross “cooking” off the list of things Suzy can do. That leaves shopping, and knowing what wine to serve. Oooh, good idea! Time to banish that care, as the great Thomas Jefferson would say. Go get a glass and join me. The toasts are on you.