Oct 27 2001
Lisa Marie
What with all the gloom and doom in the news these days, I have fallen seriously behind on celebrity gossip. The two weirdest stories to me both involve Lisa Maries — one being the curvacious actress of “Sleepy Hollow” and “Ed Wood” and the other the deeply strange daughter of The King.
Lisa Marie One, long-time girlfriend and inspiration of Tim Burton, has been summarily dumped by him in favor of Helena Bonham Carter. According to this article, they are celebrating their 3 week anniversary. Newsflash: anniversary means a year, not three weeks (or even a month). What an odd little couple they make.
And speaking of odd: Lisa Marie Two, Elvis’ little girl, is apparently now set to marry Nicolas Cage by the end of the year. You may recall that Lisa Marie was married to Michael Jackson at one point, and that Cage has a pretty flaky romantic past himself, though nothing as odd as being married to a gay black guy who is trying desperately to look both white and exactly like Diana Ross at the same time. At MOMA yesterday I saw Jeff Koon’s white and gold porcelain sculpture of Jackson and his chimp, Bubbles, and it was *very* life-like.
And speaking of denial, Anne Heche says she was never gay. Guess she was faking it all those years with E. That must be some kind of world record for faking of any kind. And finally, Kate Winslet says her divorce was caused by the pressures of her career, which is pretty surprising considering it’s all been downhill for Winslet since “Titanic” (insert joke here).
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